Hilarity Clinton
People ask me all the time if I’d ever run for president. My last name and all. I would always say I’m just not that competent, smart or diplomatic enough. Who knew I’d be perfect for the job? But if I were president, I’d make it illegal to campaign for any political office more than two weeks. I’d black out all television programming during that time and the only thing on TV would be political debates, campaign highlights and bloopers, reviews of the constitution, proposition explanations and personal promos. No sports, no soaps, no reality shows. All air time would be free. Basic and cable. Voting would be mandatory and the polls would be open for six days. We all need a rest on that seventh day. Instead of motor voter, we’d have remoter voter and you could vote with your TV remote. The technology is there now. If I can vote whether or not some freaky voiced singer can be voted off the island, or if Lindsay Lohan should lay off the sauce, I should be able to select my candidates. If we did this, we would save 1.2 billion dollars which was the cost of this year’s midterm election ad buys. That would cover the student loan amnesty which would be my next order of business. Vote for me, Hilarity Clinton, in 2008!
