Out of Control
Congratulations to Annette Bening on her Oscar nomination in THE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT, for the role described by the NYT as “a controlling lesbian.” I say it’s about time! Time not just for Annette Bening to get an Oscar. It’s way past time for a controlling lesbian role to be so honored.
Really, it’s an honor just to be nominated. And I’m not just saying that. Look at this year’s other nominated roles: really sad mom, have-you-seen-my-dad teen, really beautiful in love girl, nutzoid ballerina. We are honored just to be in the company of these groundbreaking roles, but since we so rarely get this far, I hope this really is our year. Unlike the Jets.
Make all the controlling lesbian jokes you want. Red carpet: “What are you wearing, Eddie Bauer flannel?” After-party: “YOU read Vanity Fair?” Post-Oscar: “Will you put your Oscar near your softball trophy?”
Of course there have been lesbians in film: British teacher lesbians, serial killer lesbians, nun lesbians, cowgirl lesbians, horse-loving lesbians, soccer lesbians. Just this year Angelina Jolie was one shoot-em-up, mankiller badass in SALT. But she never came out as a lesbian. She didn’t have to. Sue Sylvester is not Jane Lynch and besides that would be for the Emmy. This is a first for a boldly controlling open lesbian.
I’m working on some ideas for the controlling lesbian acceptance speech. Word to the wise: don’t you dare start up the band music while the she is thanking her gym teacher, Title IX, and PFLAG parents. That would not be pretty.
I know I speak for all controlling lesbians, when I say, “Let this be our year! Or else.”
January 28, 2011 @ 1:20 am
Yeah, being a controlling lezzie myself, I hear ya.
But why did the other one have to fuck the guy? Sigh.
Maybe we need a category “lesbians who fuck men.” Just sayin’.
January 28, 2011 @ 4:20 am
The NYT doesn’t seem to realize that most women should be in control and the world would be a better place! And, if lesbians were in control it would be more fun, relaxed, and maybe the Lipstick Lesbians could lead the PRIDE parade snapping whips!!!! I shiver with delight : )
January 29, 2011 @ 4:39 am
Help me out here. I ***HATED*** that movie! the fucking of the man was bad enough, but watching gay male porn to get off??? WTF??? And when she saw his dick for the first time??? OMG! I love Annette Benning in it, but that was about it. I was pissed as hell!
January 29, 2011 @ 5:35 am
Totally agree with Joan. Some of us have done the man thing and are actually passionately in love with our women partners. It would be nice to see that kind of lesbian portrayed in an oscar-nominated movie. I can’t celebrate this one – just means more publicity for a movie that has been heavily promoted as being groundbreaking but which just churns out all the usual male myths. I’m sure all the the boys absolutely loved it…ugh.
January 30, 2011 @ 11:05 pm
I totally agree. As soon as one of my friends told me about the lesbian sleeping with the man and the gay male porn scene, I decided I wouldn’t go see the movie. It is a straight version of what a lesbian relationship is all about. The fact that it is nominated for an Oscar just means Hollywood is patting itself on the the back – look what we did – we put lesbians on the screen.